2.20.2004

two thoughts inspired by diary of a country priest 

(i'm going to make an attempt to process things in ways that result in something other than reviews... here's a first try...)

***by the way, diary of a country priest is a robert bresson film from 1950***

1. i remembered that, while growing up roman catholic in the 80's, there was a distinct time where usage of the confessional went out of fashion. we still had to go to confession from time to time in school, but the context changed from the traditional "confessional box" approach to a private, face-to-face conversation with one of the parish priests (which were honestly not as terrifying as they sound, to be fair). i then realized that the confessional booths-- as far as i know-- have been removed entirely from the church itself (i get roped into the obligatory x-mas visit from time to time).

anyway, how strange a space is the confessional booth??? at once intimate and anonymous, strangely voyeuristic... sorta sexy. i think that artists should consider such a space in a way that goes beyond knee-jerk fear of christianity. i can't think of many examples-- before or since-- of a space that is as fucking loaded with impressions: physical, psychological, moral, sublime...

2. considerations of "god" are much more interesting to a free floatin' agnostic such as myself if i set aside all my boring assumptions about the subject and concentrate on desire. "god" is weird. he (in the masculine christian equation of the film) occupies the space of a human who is beyond human at the same time (obviously). if most people attempt to understand things by extending their human attributes to that which confronts them (i posted a bit about this in regards to having a pet), then the christian "god" exemplifies the boundary at which human terms of empathy become inappropriate. in a melancholic, atmospheric film like diary, god becomes the end goal of a kind of against-the-odds longing. if my thoughts flow in an abstract or reverent direction, this longing leads to heaven or forgiveness or some such thing. but if i look towards the tangible, there are a series of ruptures that render the character's life miserable, and therefore lacking grace or reverence in the day-to-day (i think of neutral milk hotel: "god is a place you will wait for the rest of your life").

if one accepts that a plea to god is born out of discontent with the corporeal world, i wonder what the stakes would be of a similiar plea minus the element of abstraction. this seems as though it could be a good thing-- an irrational expression of desire occupying the point where human understanding begins to wear out. i like this, once the sentiment seperates from universality and possibly death, in a sense. i guess that art functions like this at times: as an act that embodies a leap of faith or a plea to some unknown pleasure, but without the old man with the beard waiting to accept it and transform it into a skinnerbox equation of eternal reward.

2.19.2004

shock 

today at work i attempted to replace a tracklight in a jewelry counter. it was a poor fit. the light was the right size, the outlets were right, but something was fucked up.

i ended up getting electrically shocked three times. the first and third time were no big deal, but the second time was pretty intense. probably the worst i've ever felt (i'm fine-- no need to ask...).

*insert joke about why a "third time" came about here*

the weird thing about being shocked is that you experience this bizarre seperation from the jolt happening and your processing of pain. i can remember feeling something, then screaming, then thinking "why am i screaming at work???"... as if i was unaware of the very pain i was experiencing.

of course, a second or two later it was quite a little stab.

also, my co-workers had to endure me letting out a pretty serious yelp, which has a way of changing the parameters of work related anti-intimacy. it's like unwillingly giving someone a little glimpse into what you might sound like in the midst of a great tantrum. fucking embarrassing. but interesting too.

bio movies 

so i watched two quasi-documentaries this week and they got me thinking...

first, i saw the vastly overrated american splendor, a film that reminded me that i'm as sick of glorified nerd movies as i am of ones with "american" in the title (i say this, of course, as a tried-and-true nerd myself). it's not that it's a bad film neccessarily-- the little trick of intersplicing the actual comic writer in with the actor playing him was amusing-- it's just that it fits so complacently alongside all the other comic guy movies. unlike ghost world and crumb, it's far less critical of its hero, and inevitably falls prey to the same "he's a genius" routine as man on the moon did a few years back (and, no, it's not nearly as bad as that one).

the film begins by informing its audience that a seeming loser (underground comic writer harvey pekar) is actually brilliant, and then proceeds to award that very audience as if it came up with that epiphany itself. what's the fun in discovering hidden talent if it was never hidden in the first place?? i guess this brings up the least interesting aspect of "documentary," in my opinion, which is the "document." the aspect that serves as proof of something's haven-taken-place. i wonder if often in establishing such parameters-- and the assumptions/opinions that attend them-- we eliminate what makes a figure interesting in the first place.

second was the derrida documentary, which gives you a glimpse into the life of the post-structuralist philosopher (and his fabulous hair). it takes a more admirable approach-- albeit a bit typical given its subject. instead of playing out as a kind of "deconstructionism for dummies" or even a vanity piece, the majority of the film is more or less devoted to derrida evading questions. and they ask the inevitable e-true-hollywood-story-ones, too (e.g. what does derrida think of "seinfeld"??? what's his relationship with his wife like???, etc.). the thing that's most interesting about the film is that derrida himself seems simultaneously resentful of what the filmmakers expect of him, while remaining affectionate towards them as people. it's as if he's doing the filmmakers a sort of favor. and it works to the film's favor, surprisingly. through a series of very careful explanations as to why he cannot answer a variety of questions, a kind of strange portrait emerges.

i guess sometimes it takes an obstacle to get the proper flow going.

2.16.2004

moveon.org's momentum 

the closer we get to election time, the more i grow to like moveon.org.

initially, it was second only to paris hilton as a source of e-mails i was most likely not to read, but lately i've been taking the time to open up the stuff they send me.

and they're getting shit done, too... just got this encouraging little tidbit...

*from moveon*

our phone calls and emails helped win a real victory last week. After CBS rejected our Voter Fund's Super Bowl ad, we learned that the White House was being allowed to air an advocacy ad about Medicare. We told you about it, and in just a few days over 50,000 MoveOn members called and emailed to complain. On Friday, CBS pulled the ad, stating that it had violated their policy. It's a big win, and a powerful blow to the Bush Administration's campaign to cover up its Medicare sellout.

it's nice to see political mobilisation that results in something other than petitions to remove, like, the "gay teletubby" or some bullshit like that. bravo...

2.15.2004

me and kurt 



i just wanted to point out that kurt russell's hair looks exactly like mine in this movie. ok, i'm going to bed.

eight things on the brain 

eight is my favorite number...

8. tv on the radio's young liars e.p. is worth the hype. they sound nothing like the dancey brooklyn-ite art punk they're always asscociated with (liars, yeah yeah yeahs-- both of which guest on the e.p. apparently). in fact, they sound pretty distinct, especially on the first two tracks (my faves). i could tell you that the singer sounds a bit like peter gabriel, but that means almost nothing. pop structures, inventive approaches to instrumentation (the flutes at the end of the first song are particularly nice), very vocal heavy. i'm so glad indie rock artsy types are finally getting over their sing-a-phobia... with each passing day, the world is littered with less and less affected, humorless steven malkmus impersonators. thank fucking god.

7. trite as it is to say it, i feel pretty good about the world in the wake of the outkast grammy. i know how hard it is to hear even more outkast hype as "hey ya" is garnishing commercials for adam sandler movies, but fuck it-- it's the boldest move that tame-ass event has made since giving jethro tull the heavy metal award back in the late eighties. say what you will about the mindlessness of pop culture at the moment, but if you're playful with your experiments-- and you make sure people can still dance to what you come up with-- you can still slip some interesting shit under the radar. look at the neptunes...

6. chris marker's MASSIVE film a grin without a cat, which chronicles "the left" from 1967 to 1977. it moves at top speed through vietnam, bolivia, france, czechoslovakia and chile (among others), leaving an endless array of thoughts and observations in its wake. it sustains much of the lyricism which animated marker's sans soleil, one of my all time faves. i won't attempt to describe it, nor will i contend that i even understand half of it, but i'm certainly glad i saw it.

5. meg ryan on jay leno. did anyone see that??? it appears that she's got some kind of crazy lip injection job. but rather than the old kim bassinger boost (a la barbara hershey in beaches), she seems to have it on the two ends of her upper lip, giving her this bizarre bee sting smile even when she's not smiling (like nicholson in batman). it took me like five minutes to realize that it wasn't some strange ornament for an upcoming movie. i kept waiting for jay to discuss it. nope. it's just really gross plastic surgery.

4. "writing to st. peter," track four from mojave 3's new album spoon and rafter. the ideal song for headphones out in the cold. perfectly captures the familiarity of overlapping happys and sads.

3. i must confess i'm growing increasingly preoccupied with the mel gibson jesus movie. i think i'm actually gonna go and see it. the more i read about it the weirder it gets. this will eventually merit a longer review. suffice to say it strikes me as emblematic of the polarizing sentiments of my country, as well as the limits of tolerance to conservatives and liberals alike.

2. tompaine.com. a user friendly progressive politics site that keeps it real.

1. none of these entries should be read hierarchically except this one-- my friends phil and ellen got married today (valentine's day) in the cayman islands. i'm in stupid cold-ass philly due to lack of $$$$$$$$$$$$$$... but i'm very happy for them.

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